How to text women on tinder: the smart guy's guide

First impressions are, when it comes to online dating, almost everything. While you may have caught your match’s eye with your protệp tin, you want to lớn make sure they stiông xã around. And the first message you sover can make or break the conversation. I’ve been on the receiving end of my fair nói qua of bad messages — shoutout lớn the person who said I was “almost as hot as his ex” — so I know a chất lượng opener when I see it. To the people pursuing women on don’t fall victyên ổn lớn these unimpressive sầu messages. 

1. “Hey”

This may seem like a foolproof way to lớn slide into lớn your match’s inbox, but while you are unlikely lớn offover anyone, you are also unlikely khổng lồ make yourself memorable. So for God’s sake, get a little more personal. Whether it’s a sweet compliment, a relevant pick-up line, or a message that refers khổng lồ her bio or pictures, you want to lớn show you’re paying attention. If something about her stands out lớn you, mention it. Sharing similar interests is a good way khổng lồ earn a reply. 


Bạn đang xem: How to text women on tinder: the smart guy's guide

“Can we move sầu this over khổng lồ text?”

Of course, there is a point at which you should totally should vì this, but that point is not within the first five minutes of talking. Asking a girl for her number or on a date before getting khổng lồ know her even a little bit is a no-go. Ease inkhổng lồ a conversation — she’ll be much more inclined lớn save your number later on.

3. “Your body…”

Commenting on your match’s physical appearance isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but make sure you’re pointing out an appropriate physical attribute. Try a kind word about her eyes or smile. In other words, don’t be thirsty. And rethành viên, compliments can extend beyond her physical features. If she has her Spotify linked to lớn her, you can bring up her excellent musical taste and strike up a more interesting rapport.

4. “I’m sorry for Super Liking™ you. When I first saw you I was overwhelmed, now you just seem regular. No offense.”

Insulting your match by saying her bio is basic or that you don’t typically go for redheads won’t vì chưng anything but turn her off. The phrase “boys are mean khổng lồ the girls they like” has been thrown around since we were kids, but it’s extremely problematic. If you aren’t inkhổng lồ her protệp tin, you don’t need khổng lồ Like her. Because there is one nugget of childhood wisdom that holds true: If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.


If you don’t have sầu something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

Xem thêm:

5. “On a scale of one khổng lồ America, how miễn phí are you tonight?”

Yawn. Yes, sending your match a pickup line can be a good way to get và keep her attention, as long as it’s interesting & original. If you feel lượt thích the message you’re about to sover is played out, 1. it probably is and 2. maybe try running it past one of your female friends khổng lồ get their take. Like the very vanilla “hey,” an overused line won’t make you st& out. Change it up lớn avoid blending in. 

6. “Why did you Like me?”

I’m sure we both know why, so this question just seems unnecessary. If you want to lớn hear your match say you’re good-looking, compliment her. Chances are she’ll compliment you right baông xã, and you’ll find out why you caught her eye. A win-win!

7. “You and your frikết thúc look familiar! I must’ve sầu matched with her before.”

I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s something icky about someone telling me that he also matched with my friend. I get it: We’re in the same fairly small geographic area, & it happens. But this line will almost always turn a girl off, so if you’re interested in them, avoid shooting your shot this way. Or, when you see an old match’s friover on, consider just Noping them. 

8. “I can tell you’re a freak.”

I know a picture is worth a thousvà words, but I find it hard khổng lồ believe that you can tell when a girl is a freak in the sheets from a few photos. Assuming anything about a person, especially before you even meet them, is a no-go. That’s doubly true when you’re trying lớn make a good impression. Not to lớn mention, sexual innuendos lượt thích this are best avoided, so also forget about lines lượt thích, “You look like the type to lớn skết thúc nudes.” Did you really think that was going khổng lồ work? 

9. “Are you DTF?”

Wow, and they said chivalry was dead. While being clear about your intentions is a good thing, this line is not. It shows a laông xã of effort on your part, và your chances of getting a response are slyên to lớn none. Pump the brakes và remember there is a human on the other over of your chat.

10. “Tell me about yourself.”

Is this a job interview? Loosen up! It’s great that you want to know more about her, but you don’t want it khổng lồ sound lượt thích you’re conducting an interrogation. Ask lighthearted questions about her life instead. Something creative, lượt thích “Who are you embarrassed lớn admit you follow on Instagram?” goes a long way.

11. “Your photos are way better than the other trolls I’ve sầu seen on here.”

While I get the intent, most women are not fans of people degrading other women as a size of flattery. Compliments that don’t insult other people are the best kinds of compliments; there’s no need lớn mention other people and spread negativity. Make your match the sole focus instead. A simple, “your photos stopped me in my tracks” will do the trichồng. 


ompliments that don’t insult other people are the best kinds of compliments; there’s no need to mention other people và spread negativity.

12. “Who’s your friend in the last pic? Can you give her my number?”

I can’t believe sầu I even have sầu khổng lồ say this, but don’t be this guy. You matched with this girl because she is interested in you, so why would she happily pass you off to lớn her friend after you basically overlooked her existence? It’s simple: Don’t Like someone you’re not interested in. 

13. “Nice. Nope. Yeah.”

What’s the easiest way khổng lồ kill a conversation? One-word responses. They make it seem lượt thích you don’t care and/or you’re not a great conversationadanh mục, two qualities no one wants in a match. If you’re not interested enough to carry on a back-and-forth, spare the awkwardness & unmatch. If that’s not the case, put in some real effort.

Xem thêm:

14. “You should smile more in your pictures. You’d look way hotter.”

Cringe. Women are already told khổng lồ smile by catcallers, so there’s absolutely no need to bring this lớn their messages, too. While you may think this is a harmless suggestion, it comes off as misogynistic and suggests that she’s not attractive enough already. Perhaps try telling her that her smile is beautiful and that you’d love to lớn see it in person. 

15. “I knew you’d Like me — you’re lượt thích my 1,000th match on here.” 

Even if she’s into lớn you, telling a girl that you know this is the case before you’ve sầu even exchanged a few messages won’t start you off on the right foot. There are other ways khổng lồ tell your match that you feel a connection or that you’re a catch without failing a vibe kiểm tra. Let her know that she’s easy khổng lồ talk khổng lồ or you like that you share a bunch of interests — anything besides implying you already swept her off her feet.

Chuyên mục: Share